“WE” the people!

Children being children, are famous for mischievousness. They will mess around, get their friends attention in soem or the other way, poke each other with a pencil, start a fight, narrate an exaggerated incidence of bravery, shout out or engage in some gimmicks.

I have had my share of struggling with these ever-howling creatures until I got comfortable with them & repeatedly told myself - Humans are born animals! You cannot escape it!

In school, for discipline purposes we are often asked to keep ‘pin drop silence’ in class.. But this ‘teacher’s trick’ hasn't worked for me. I rather failed when I tried it more than once. This time I had got the knack of getting everyone to suffer with me rather than me doing it all alone.

Something likewise happened in one of our sessions with children. Every time these kids are on a ‘control dose’ from me either by threatening them with a shout, big eyes, commanding voice or the ultimate - ‘Get out of here.’

Thinking of it, these all techniques can be disrespectful so I tried to work out different ways to get them ‘Thinking’... or at least get them ‘Sit’ for the sessions.Our sessions are about having a safe environment to discuss anything & everything one can! In every group there are at least 2-3 children who are seriously interested. The interested ones always have complaints about the mischievous as they find them creating havoc in the sessions. “Why don’t you scold them? They always disturb the class and we find it difficult attending sessions because of them. Why don’t you get them out of the class? Or take them to the principal's office?” They often ask us. True to our work, we prefer not answering & asking the same questions to them so that they themselves ‘Think’ about the answer rather than us having to give it to them. 

Out of nowhere, a girl comes up to ask, ‘May I go to get my bottle? I left it in the classroom.’ Now, with practice, I have managed to attain a cool temper. And hence, I , unlike them, could ‘Think’ & figure out what to do with these monkeys?  ‘Can we work on asking relevant questions, today?,’ I said. Someone said, ‘What is that?’ Another said, ‘It means asking questions related to the topic of discussion.’ They were excited to try it out. And so they did. Just as they were about to begin, someone said, ‘Look at him, he is playing with a wrapper,’.

Me: Can anyone ask a relevant question on this? 

Girl 1 : Are you not interested in the discussion?

Me: Wait. Is that an open question or a closed one? (We had discussed on this in the earlier sessions)

Girl 2: Closed. 

Me: Why? 

G 2: Because it can have an answer as a ‘Yes’ or a ‘No’, nothing beyond that.

Me: Okay. How can you make it open?

G1 : What are his interests?

Me: Good. More?

G2: Why does it interest him ?

Meanwhile, the subject of the topic is looking at us in surprise with his face saying - ‘How come they started talking about me? (More surprisingly,even when I was not paying attention?

Another boy complains of the cacophony around. I used the same techniques as above & questions like “Why might they be interested in running away from session over attending it? And yet what makes them stay here despite the boredom? What happens when they are not in the sessions? What can we do to make them feel interested in the sessions?” started coming up. Indeed, we discussed them & came up with reasons like - probably they need attention, they might be forced to be here, they may be feeling stress free and included because they aren't forced to sit in the session, etc. While the chaotic group was listening to this, their eyes were twinkling with what was happening - they were being the topic of discussion but in an unusual way - Oh what a proud it is! Two of the boys even agreed with a thumbs up to 'they were forced to come here & also that they feel stress free here.’ Now, they were feeling accepted. Despite their mischief, someone was paying attention to them & they were feeling respected, understood & they gradually started being the part of discussion.

At the end, the girls came telling me that in these sessions, they have not only learnt to 'focus’ but also 'focus despite the chaos around’ & that's helping us in anything we do otherwise. Indeed,a lot of learning, at such a tender age! 

Suffering being an inevitable part of life, we need to be tolerant towards it, being focused, no matter what comes our way. Natural thinkers as they are, children never fail to mesmerize you with their wit & natural observation.

By the way, all this happened without having to ask, 'Why might I be not pulling them out of the sessions?’